No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Randomize
