It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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