why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
