so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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