is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
they're like a gay fantastic four
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
