I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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