Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
