So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize