She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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