i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
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