I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
