So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
operation harelip BJ is a go
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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