I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
