I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
