I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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