is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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