i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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