so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
