Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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