hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
They have beer where we have blood.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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