is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
