Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
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Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
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A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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