He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize