you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
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