Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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