Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
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