She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
