im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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