STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize