I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
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