my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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