no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Randomize
