cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
