Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
No subtext here. People are naked.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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