ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Randomize
