the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
so much tequila, so little girl.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
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