im gay
i know
yea but for you.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Randomize
