you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
