I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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