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Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I know her cup size but not her name....
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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