i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
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