my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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