Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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