So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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