Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Your dad touched me again.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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