he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
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Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
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Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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