Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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