She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize