This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
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