Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
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